Lord of the Rings 3000 – Chapter 3- A chat and a walk

by Oct 18, 2004Stories

The new Fellowship, which had just been formed the day before, was waiting for the most important person Frodo, Ring-bearer, because he was bearing the Ring at the time. The Fellowship, not Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin and Gandalf, sat round waiting. Legolas was polishing his gun, with a third layer of polish; Boromir was polishing his motorbike, and with no one knows how many layers. Aragorn was checking his wiring, and Cyber Gimli had gone to sleep, or as he called it charging the batteries, into his small little grey box.
Legolas finished his first bottle of polish, then pulled out another one. Boromir getting annoyed asked,
“How many layers are you going to polish your gun?” Legolas looked to him, then Boromir’s bike.
“How many layers are you going to polish your bike? I only do five, the blood would stain, I mean you’re from Gondor you guys don’t go nuts over your bikes.” Starting polishing again, like he didn’t care, which he didn’t away.
“Because, I’ve been stuck in Rohan for twenty years. You get used to it.” Going along with his polishing.
“You know you’re not going to take that thing with you. Plus how can you get stuck in Rohan?” Forgetting his polishing.
“I liked it in Rohan, so I stayed, and then they wouldn’t let me out. So, I nicked the king’s horse. I’m gonna give it back, so I might as well make it shine.” Going on with it.
“What sort of weapons do they use in Rohan?” Cyber Gimli popped out of his box, into his see-through blue self. As in Rohan they do not tell what their weapons are so no one knows what they use, because who ever they fight die. “I mean you ran off, so you might as well tell.”
“Chains.” Boromir said simply.
“Chains?” Cyber Gimli asked.
Legolas answered, “You know, with mad loonies on bike swinging bike chains around in the air, very effective. You know with the leather jackets, tattoos, piercing, no wonder you left.” Boromir and Gimli looked at him, wondering why he knew, “I’ve seen those nutcases driving around.” Shaking his head.
“Why what wouldn’t make them look like nutcases?” Boromir asked, sounding offended.
“Anything, but they are nutcases.” Legolas replied.
“So, what does a Mirkwood elf like you use?” asked Cyber Gimli.
“So, it matters what kind of elf I am?” sounding very offended, in a way.
“Well….Mmmmmm… It does matter they’re sort of different aren’t they, from different elves from different places? I mean.” Cyber Gimli wondered.
“A couple of things are different, one thing is,” Legolas looked around a bit, for something then spotted Elrond, walking past, “Hey, Elrond!” he shouted across to him, grabbing Aragorn’s attention.
“What?!” Elrond asked, Legolas pulled out him gun and shot an arrow at him. But, it didn’t hit him; in Elrond’s place was a small shrub.
“Rivendell elves turn into shrubs.” He finished, “What elves in Lothlorien do, I don’t know. Mirkwoods turn into large, strong trees.”
“And, the arrow would go right through you.” Elrond said, getting up and walking off.
“And, your fighting skills?” Cyber Gimli asked.
“We, Mirkwood elves, use something no one using, they use it for sports.” Legolas said, like it was a guessing game.
“Hockey sticks.” Legolas said part way through laughing.
“Ouch!” they said, “That would scare them off and they would never attack you again, it wouldn’t kill them. You idea is worst, and scary. Never go into Mirkwood, I`ll remember.” Boromir said, to the others, then to himself.
“You elves are evil!” Cyber Gimli said.
“Hey!” Elrond said from a couple of stories up from the ground, “Watch it you little Cyber Dwarf! If you lot don’t stop with insulting, breaking my tables, lying where you come from, or trying to kill me. I’ll be more than happy to kick you lot out; than wait for the others.”
Which he did, when the others arrived.
They walked out of Rivendell, past the mountains it took them days. And, just when everyone had had enough of everyone else, they decided to have a break at some large rocks, easy to hide by.
Sam had his BBQ out and running, Frodo was eating the corn-on-the-cobs, Boromir decided to show Merry and Pippin how to fight. Legolas and Aragorn were having a shooting competition, shooting any random bird that flew by, or into a cloud, or into the sky and where it would come down. Many landing of Pippin and Aragorn, all shot by Legolas. Cyber Gimli was complaining inside his box, and Gandalf was listening for hours on end of his complaining. Then a cloud coming closer and closer. Sam stared up at it, “What’s that?” The Fellowship followed his gaze.
“Whatever it is,” Aragorn bragged, “I bet you can’t shoot it.” Looking to Legolas, “There my friend you will be surprised.” He pulled out his gun, and shoot into the darkness of the crowd. A little black dot fell, SLAT! Onto the ground, the rest of it changed into a face, an angry face, staring right towards the Fellowship.
“Wahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!” Sam and Pippin screamed when Gandalf poured the beer into the BBQ.
“Great, I have to spend ages with a guy who’s trying to kill me! This is your fault!” Legolas shouted at Aragorn.
“Please, you were the one who shot it.” As everyone else, a part from those two was running around hiding everything, “At least you know how Elrond feels.”
“I’m not the one slowly killing his daughter.” Legolas stated, leaning up against a rock. An “OOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” came from where the hobbits were hiding, starting a fight.
“Why you little b-” being pulled away by Gandalf, who whispered, “Not now!”. Legolas quickly ducked down behind a rock as the flock of birds came past. Then banging his fist on the floor when he remembered, “Damn, I forgot the dwarf. Oh, well.” Who was lying on the floor in the box, but wasn’t noticed.
When they stood up, after breaking up Legolas and Aragorn from killing each other, Gandalf stated the facts, 1. They had ran out of cheese (not helping), and 2. They had to go over the mountains.
With every step they took they had Legolas to deal with, as insulting them everyday because of the fact they sank in the snow, was not because they were heavy. But, he didn’t care, they walked and walked and walked and then decided to turn round. And, going through the mines of Moria


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