Long Drop, Sudden Stop – ~ The venting of a sullen author

by Feb 8, 2004Stories

AN + Disclaimer: This is a short story. The title was partially copied off of Pirates of the Caribbean. I took nothing else from it. Frodo, Sam, and Gollum are Tolkien’s as well as Middle-earth and all it’s references. The inspiration for the story came from Al’s Waiter’s MST of GreyLadyBast’s story Taken Far to Literally. This story is all in the sense of fun. So if you’re offended by the making fun of Mary Sue’s please don’t read it. I dedicate this story to all Faithful MSTers and their avid readers. ++++++ = Time skip ******* = character change. So with that all said my I introduce “Long Drop, Sudden Stop.”

“Thanks for the ride, Jill.” Priscilla called waving at her friend.

“No problem, Pris.” Jill called before revving up her Mustang and driving off.

Priscilla, Pris as her friends called her, sauntered up to the front door of her Mansion. She rang the bell and a moment later a maid opened the door.

“Yes, milady?” the maid, Bella, asked.

“Hi, Bella, could you have a snack brought up to my room please. And please be sure it is healthy.” She said with perfect politeness.

“Yes, Miss,” Bella responded.

“Thank you,” Pris replied before flouncing up the steps and into her large room.

She automatically went to her desk and did her homework. Her report card fell open as she worked. Pris sighed with relief yet again the A+ in Quantum Physics was hard fought. She had only gotten and A- on the final but luckily all her extra credit brought it up. She had had all A+’s across the board since Kindergarten. So she now took College Level classes, even though she was only 15. It would have been a shame to break her perfect record.

She finished her homework and snack. She then pranced down the stairs to talk with her parents.


Later that evening, Priscilla sat in front of her mirror in her beautiful white night gown, brushing out her silky golden hair. Her melodious voice was singing the song her father had had specially composed for her.

I’m perfect yes its true.
I’m perfect through and through…

“Good night, darling. How’s my perfect, little angle?” her father called interrupting her perfect song.

“Perfect, thank you for asking. Good night, Daddy,” she replied her bright blues eyes sparkling even in the fading light.

She crossed to her bed; her pink skirt and matching ensemble was laid out perfectly pressed for the morning. She slipped under the satin covers of her large soft bed.

She sat up and watched a private showing of Lord of the Ring: Return of the King which her father had bought for her.


It was right at the end where Frodo, Sam, and Gollum were in Mount Doom.

“Oh how I whish I was there instead of here in my perfect house with my perfect family living out my perfect life.” Priscilla said to no one. With a sudden sound *Whoosh sparkle sparkle sparkle* her wish was granted.

She found herself floating over Middle-earth then she started to fall. But she was not afraid soon she would be safe in Middle-earth and she would meet Legolas who would fall instantly in love with her.

`He will swear to protect me and I will never be alone,’ she thought to herself. She smiled to herself as she fell through the sky, overcoming her fear of heights.

She saw below the outline of Mordor. Priscilla could see the peak of Mount Doom. Now she knew why she was here, she would save Frodo and Sam. So, Frodo would never have to lose his finger. Then they would all praise her and she would become the Queen of Arda, all would be well and perfect just like her.


Sam watched the struggle between Frodo and the Invisible Gollum.

Suddenly, they all stopped and looked up at the sky to see a figure clad in white falling quickly.

“I Haaave cooooome toooooo saavvvve yoooooooouu!” the figure called from the sky

“Is that a bird?” Sam asked in wonder.

“Noooo stupid fat hobbitses. Yummy Birdses doesn’t talk.” The still invisible Gollum retorted.

“I think it called itself our Savior.” Sam spoke ignoring the retched creature.

“Well then I guess it’s supposed to help us.” Frodo replied.

As the figure grew nearer they saw it was a young human girl with shiny hair and sparkling teeth.

She was coming in very fast. Too fast. Her body smashed into the side of the volcano and then fell down into the boiling lava.

“Ahhhhhh!” Pris screamed as she started to burn, “This isn’t supposed to happen. I’m perrrrrrrrffeeeeeeeeeccccccct…”

And with that the vile yet perfect Priscilla was once and for all out of everyone’s hair.

“Well so much for helping us.” Frodo sighed, breaking the silence and with that Frodo and Gollum continued the struggle. I think we all know how that turned out.

The End


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