“It’s alright, Arwen. I understand.” Aragorn says looking into the eyes of the most beautiful face he’s ever seen in his life. I know he doesn’t understand, but he insists that he does.
Tears are running down my face as I strain to look up at him. By Valar, this is so difficult. He doesn’t want me to see it, but I can tell he is on the verge of crying, as well. Males always want to be stronger than what they really are. But I wish he would have. Something inside me wants to see how much he wants me to stay. Slightly selfish, I know, but standing here at the dock I want to know that he loves me enough to cry.
Yes, we are at the dock. The ship is preparing to leave. My father, grandparents, friends, everyone I know is leaving for the Grey Havens, and so am I. Aragorn is here, too. He’s being so difficult. No, that’s a lie. He’s being perfect and I don’t know why. I guess it would just be so much easier to leave if I were angry with him.
By Valar, he’s going to be the one thing I’ll miss here in Middle-earth. I hope he does all the things he’s meant and wanted to do. I’ll miss him terribly.
We both embrace each other. He’s so warm. For some strange reason, Aragorn has always been so warm, ever since I first met him. I’ll always remember how warm he is. Both in body and in mind. And in heart.
“I love you. I’ll always love you, Aragorn.” I whisper into his ear. I feel his grip on me tighten and ignore the pain that comes from it. I hug him hearder, as well.
Why am I leaving, again? Oh yes, that’s right. Death, pain, loneliness, despair. Now I remember. I will miss him, though.
I could live in this moment, alone, all my life, but I’m suddenly reminded about the ship to the Grey Havens by a call from behind. Ah, Aragorn. He’s always been able to make me forget about anything and everything besides him. And that’s a gift.
He finally lets me go and quickly turns away to his horse. I don’t think he even looked at me. I feel so empty. He mounts his horse like a broken king and rides away out of sight. Not far away I hear his cry lift in the air and, by Eru, it hurts to hear him. It hurts like my heart being ripped from my chest and stomped on.
I do love him.
But I know he will heal, sooner or later. I can already see it. Aragorn’s crowned King and Eowyn, the beautiful Lady of Rohan, will be his Queen. They would be a very good couple. Eowyn’s a good woman, I’ve met her, and she should be well for Aragorn. Ah, yes. It will turn out in the end, it must.
But I do feel so cold. So empty. So hurt. Wasn’t leaving supposed to keep me from feeling like this? So why do I? Because I love him, that’s why.
I can’t think about this any longer. I’ve already made a decision. It’s done.
I turn and step on the boat…
We return to the forests again. Our hobbit friend has lost all faith and finds the true meaning of apathy by the end of this chapter. He is taken captive by a band of elves and one human. This chapter suggests that some of his past will be revealed soon.