What Happened When Legolas & Gimli Reached Valinor – A sort’ve sequel to Elrond Reaches Valinor…

by Aug 5, 2003Other News

A small white ship is sailing into a bay.There are 3 people awaiting it: A tall Maia and two Halflings.Suddenly there comes the pecuilar sound of a Dwarf singing.

Gimli: Hi ho, hi ho, to Valinor we go, hi ho-
Legolas: Gimli, for the last time before I throw you overboard to swim the rest of the way to Valinor, SHUT UP!
Gimli: All right already! (mutters) Touchy Elves. Sing day and night and won’t even let you finish a verse.

The ship reaches the dock. A tall blond Elf leaps out and ties it up.

Frodo: Legolas!
Sam: Mr. Legolas!
Gandalf: Mae govannen, Legolas.
Legolas: Frodo! Sam! Mithrandir! Gimli, get our and get over here!
Gimli: Hello, you lot. So, Legolas, is this the West you keep on talking about?
Legolas: Yes.
Gimli: Humph. Where’s Galadriel?
Frodo: Talking to her brother. She’ll be here presently. So, how is everyone?
Legolas: Dead. That’s why we came, you know. There was no one left from the old times but us when we left. Where’s Bilbo?
Frodo: Asleep.
Legolas: Bilbo’s still asleep at three o’clock! Has he gotten up at all?
Gimli: I want to go see Galadriel.
Frodo: No. Who’s the king in Gondor now?
Legolas: I don’t know. Ask Gimli. (starts talking to Gandalf in Elvish)
Frodo: Gimli, who’s the king in Gondor now?
Gimli: Aragorn’s oldest. Eldarion or something like that. I want to go see Galadriel.
Legolas: Gimli, I realize that Galadriel is the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen and that you’re beard over boots in love with her, but you’ve talked about her nonstop the entire 4-month trip here, and now I will break an oar over your head if you don’t SHUT UP!
Galadriel: Mae govannen, Ringbearer, Sam, Olorin, Legolas. Elen sila lumenn omen tielvo, Lock-bearer.
Gimli: Hello. You’re looking even more beautiful than when I saw you last, O fairest, most lovely of all the elf-maidens in Middle-earth.
Celeborn: Hey, lay off on the compliments. She’s already married to me, y’know.
Frodo: Actually, Luthien was more beautiful than Galadriel ever was. No offense.
Gimli: WHAT?!
Celeborn: What?!
Galadriel: He’s right, you know. Luthien was the fairest maiden that has ever lived or ever will live.
Gimli: Huh?!
Celeborn: Oh. Right.
Manwe: (droning) Hello and welcome to Valinor. A High Feast is being prepared in your hon-What on Arda is a DWARF doing here?!?!?!
Gimli: Galadriel invited me. Who are you, anyway?
Legolas: That’s Manwe. He’s the big boss around here.
Gimli: Oh. Hehehe. Hi!
Manwe: Galadriel, you’ve got a LOT of explaining to do!



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