Things LOTR Characters would NEVER say Part2 – More humorous phrases based on the book and movie

by May 4, 2002Other News

Here are the next 10 phrases in the series of “things you would never hear LOTR characters say” (Though I had to shorten the title to make it fit). If you haven’t read Part 1 yet, it includes the 1st 20 phrases that I created. Enjoy!

21. Orc: I need a makeover!

22. Strider: Just how I want to spend my weekend: guiding a bunch of little people through the wilderness!

23. Hobbits: Just how we wanted to spend our weekend: being guided by a Big Person through the wilderness!

24. Gandalf: (at Isengard) Well, the view’s nice, but the location’s horrible!

25. The Watchers: Gee, my neck is stiff!

26. Legolas: Grandmother! What large, pointy ears you have!

27. Gimli: I’m not too short! You’re too tall!

28. Nazgûl: How long did the warranty on that Morgul-knife last again?

29. Balrog: Fe Fi Foe Fum, I smell the blood of…WHAT THE HECK IS THAT!?!?

30. Shelob: How should I eat this hobbit? Extra poisoned or original recipe? Or maybe I should just go with raw, with a slight hint of paralysis.

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