A Maiden of Faith - Chapter 11


Katrina sank onto her bed, tears staining her pillow. The pain in her back was gone, but the pain in her heart was new, and stung deep. How could Eldarion do this to her? He had been so kind, so nice, and now... He was rude, and arrogant...

Her sobs wretched her breathing. The new red nightshift she wore was rumpled now, and she had stepped on it's hem, tearing it. What had made her look? Why did she all ways have to look? Curiosity killed the cat. Well, if she were a cat she'd be dead, and she knew it... What made her want to know everything? Why did she have to think she needed to know everything?

She clutched one her pillows to herself, seeking comfort. Why did she care what he thought? She barely knew him. Yet, she felt like she had known him forever.

Her thoughts wandered to one of her friends back home... Mark, he had all ways been her friend. They had established the fact that they were like brother and sister. She had given him advice on girls countless times, and now, when he wasn't there, she needed him... Her dear friend... Her dear brother in Christ. But she was so far from home... So far, that she felt like she would never return.

Why had God put her here? What was the reason for her pain? Did He not promise to hold her in times of need, that when everything fell she'd be held? And now He seemed so far away, that she could not hear His voice. While only a few hours ago she had felt so close, that she felt no pain, only awe at His wonder. Now, she was alone, truly alone in this Middle Earth. Forgotten by everything, left to her tears that burned her cheeks so deeply they felt like acid on her care worn face.

Darkness had closed in around her, shrouding the light of hope. Her heart ached and her breathing was labored. She looked over the precipice of sanity, and wondered if the tumble off the edge would hurt all that bad. Perhaps, if she went insane, the pain would fade. But as she looked on, she saw the shadowy fog of madness. In that instant, she wrenched herself away from the edge. Only to be faced with another thought.

Would depression be that bad? It would remind her constantly of herself, her self pity. But it would also distract her from all else that moved. Yet, being reminded all the time of hurtful words was terrible.

She could just push the hurt to the farthest fringe of memory. Bottle them up, place them in the sea of her life to drift away and be forgotten. But she could one day pick the bottle up, be painfully reminded, and shocked.

No, only one answer would work. God. Give it all to Him. To cast the cares on His shoulders and He would be there. He was so far away...

Then, like the answer to her silent prays came the sign... Stars. Their twinkling outline that of a cross...

***********

"Let go of me!" Lothmîr thrashed about in the strong arms. "Free me!"

"I asked you to hold still," the hard voice answered. "Though, you seemed to not hear me..."

She had been caught in her hope of escape from the madness she had created. Though, her captor was still unknown to her, for she could not turn in his grasp.

"Let me go, or I'll wake this whole house!" She screeched, her feet came off the ground... So he was very tall...

"I don't think you want to do that. What will Aragorn think when he finds you in his home, where his son also lives? I'd hate to be at that meeting!" The man laughed hardily.

"Then let me go, and you wont!"

"I'm afraid I cannot do that! Eldarion, just go in. See if she is all right."

"I can hear crying. I do not want to embarrass her more." He glared at Lothmîr, his eyes stony.

"Don't look at me like that. The rat shouldn't have been listening!"

"That's enough out of you!" The man shook her in his hands.

"Who are you and what right have you to hold me like this?" She cried as he jolted her about.

"Why, you cannot recognize my voice?"

"No!"

"I am Elfwine, and Eldarion gave me permission." The young man announced proudly.

"A man of Rohan! And a son of the king Eomer none the less! Unhand me, prince, for if you do not I'll will make it known to your father of your doings!" She thrashed her arms and hit his elbows, to no avail.

"Ai. But it is not the wrath of my father I fear. But that of my mother, when she hears you denounced a fellow woman so boldly!" Elfwine was the son of Eomer, king of Rohan, and Lothiriel, daughter of Imrahil of Dol Amroth. His mother had a fire of her own that made him wonder how his father found her so attractive when they first met. She could wield a sword and fire and arrow more sure than most mortals. Yet, it was her fire that had enthralled Eomer so thoroughly. His father would laugh at this situation, but his mother would unleash her wrath. Though, not on her son, but rather this maiden of Rohan. Lothiriel could not stand it when anyone spoke poorly of any woman, for she had once been the down spoken, broken, and sorrowful. "Yes, if I were you I would fear the mightiest of mortal women, Lothiriel Queen, Lothmîr!"

Eldarion chuckled, for the same thing had been going through his mind. Then, the sobbing stopped. He looked up at Elfwine, who nodded. His friend carried the girl of Rohan off, out the building, into the dark of night.

**********

Katrina sat, looking out her window, her hands folded in her lap, and lips moving slowly in silent words. Tears still came, but their descent down her cheeks had slowed, and the wrenching sobs had stopped.

Until now she had not realized how soft the red nightshift was. Golden thread embroidered the hem, which was torn now, and the neckline, wet from gathering tears. Gold was interwoven into the bodice, shining in the moon and star light.

A creak came from her door. She did not turn to look, or even take a sharp intake of breath. No longer did she care.

Strong arms surrounded her, holding her close. The person's head came to rest on hers, and warm breath brushed against her forehead.

She did not move, not when it hurt so bad. The words had cut deep, opening her heart with the double edged sword of the tongue. Cutting her to ribbons, and pinning her against the wall of sorrow.

Suddenly, soft words came from the person holding her, softly singing them to her. Never had the word sounded so lovely, in all the times she had heard them.

Lay down
Your sweet and weary head
Night is falling
You have come to journey's end
Sleep now
Dream - of the ones who came before
They are calling
From across a distant shore
Why do you weep?
What are these tears upon your face?
Soon you will see
All of your fears will pass away
Safe in my arms
You're only sleeping
What can you see
On the horizon?
Why do the white gulls call?
Across the sea
A pale moon rises
The ships have come
To carry you home
And all will turn to silver glass
A light on the water
All souls pass
Hope fades
Into the world of night
Through shadows falling
Out of memory and time
Don't say
We have come now to the end
White shores are calling
You and I will meet again
And you'll be here in my arms
Just sleeping
What can you see
On the horizon?
Why do the white gulls call
Across the sea
A pale moon rises
The ships have come
To carry you home
And all will turn to silver glass
A light on the water
Gray ships pass
Into the West

Katrina stared out at the stars, as if they were talking to her, as if she had not heard the man singing. Though, the words had reached her, telling her that she would be going home, someday.

Suddenly, she stirred, ever so slightly. Looking up, she saw the eyes of the beholder. Eldarion looked down at her, holding her close, seeking to comfort her in her time of need. His arms clutched her even closer to himself. Never did he want this moment to fade, never...

"Eldarion..." She was jolted out of her reserve, and she realized who she was looking at. Jumping up, she stepped away from him, facing him. "Get away from me, Deceiver!"

"Ëarannawen, I am not here to deceive you!" He stood and tried to come to her, but she shook her head.

"No, you are! You are trying to lie to me with kindness! I know what you are! You're a snake in the grass! When I least expect it, you'll bite me, and make me bleed, until I have no more blood to fall. Then I will be cold, and lifeless, just as you are!" She groaned in anger. She hugged her arms to herself, as if to make the distance greater.

"No... Katrina, I would never do that! On my honor!" He made to move towards her.

"Honor? You speak to me of honor?" Tears welled up in her eyes and her lips pursed together. "Only God has true honor. You have none. You broke my trust this night. No longer will I look to you!"

Not knowing what else to do, he grabbed her Bible from the night stand. "Then this! On this, I would never do that to you, Katrina. Not while this is still true." Dropping it on her bed he sighed. "You, child of God, I would never hurt. May His wrath smite me off the face of this earth if ever I do, intentionally."

"Don't say that... Don't... You will surely die..." She began to collapse, worry overcoming her.

Eldarion reached out, and caught her gently. "Meleth nîn... Do not do this. I do not wish to hurt you..." His hand softly caressed her back.

"Lord! Do not smite him... He knows not what he said..."

"What did I say?" He stopped his caress. There was a deeper meaning to that phrase, and it was important.

"I am a wretch, and I was haunting your dreams-"

"Stop, those were not my words, but Lothmîr's. I have sent her away. She had no right of speaking such lies. No, meleth, you are no wretch, and I would be honored if you blessed my dreams..." He held her close to himself again, and she was supporting her own weight.

Katrina thought about it for a moment. Something told her her accusations had been falsely made, a voice inside her head. "Oh, I am sorry for not trusting you. I should have given you the benefit of the doubt." She nuzzled her face into his shoulder. "By the way, what does meleth mean? I know that nîn means my."

"Love, it means love,"he whispered into her ear.

"Really... Well, you are definitely wearing your heart on your sleeve!" She laughed.

"Might I know your reaction?" He asked.

"Hm... Yes. But you're going to have to lean closer for me to tell you." As he leaned closer, she smiled. Then, like lightning, her lips caught his for an instant, and then flew away. His smile warmed her heart, and she knew then that God had blessed her life with this man, whether from Earth or Middle Earth.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**
What'd you think? Like it? Lothmîr is a little turkey, isn't she? I myself don't care for her, but you have to have a villain! (Don't worry, she's not the only one!) Happy reading. Oh, and if you didn't notice, the song was Into the West from the RotK, it was a bit of a twist to have him sing it! Hehe...

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