O Leglas - And Ode to Legolas . . . not

O Legolas
By Lily Took and Nienna Telrunya

O Legolas, you remind me
Of a cup of steaming tea,
You both are so hot,
The fangirls like you a lot.

O Legolas with your blond hair,
You remind me of a chair
With your blank and wooden stare.
But the fangirls don't care.

O Legolas, bold archer true,
With Gimli, many orcs you slew.
But fangirls do not like the dwarf -
They find him worse than Lieutenant Worf!

O Legolas, prince of Mirkwood,
If only you I understood!
So ethereal and so aloof,
Will you come and patch my roof?

O Legolas, you used to be so smart,
But fangirl drool warped your heart!
Now you are a helpless slave,
Turned hormonal and depraved.

O Legolas with your golden locks,
Greenleaf, you have dirty socks!
That is why I know I must say
"Goodbye!" to you . . . and run away.

I was going to publish this before (long ago when it was written) but I forgot. Sorry.

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