News |
Top the Things You Can Do to Seriously Confuse The Fellowship
April 27, 2007
Submitted By Lady Elwen
Comment on This
Email to a Friend
Digg This
10. Tell them about your world
9. Ask Gandalf tirelessly whether or not Balrogs have wings.
8. Ask Gimli if he knows " Hi-Ho, Hi-Ho, It's off to work we go".
7. Use as much slang in every sentence as you possibly can.
6. Go up to each individual member of the Fellowship and ask them the time. Whether or not they give you an answer, sigh, and go ask another person. Continue until you have asked them all. Repeat.
5. Attempt to explain politics.
4. Refuse to believe Legolas when he tells you he is an elf. Look at him sternly and tell him that elves don't exist. Tell him even if they did exist, they wouldn't be found in temperate zones since they live at the north pole. they wouldn't be archers either, they make toys, cookies and shoes so they wouldn't have time. And Santa would get mad. Don't explain the meaning of temperate. Don't tell him who Santa is.
3. Sing random songs like "Man! I feel like a woman!" at innopportune moments, such as the mines of Moria, etc.
2. Ask random people (elves, men, Orcs) to pose with you for a picture, at more innopportune moments, ie Helms Deep.
And...
1. After Frodo destroys the Ring, say in your most carefree way, "Hey, why didn't we just take the eagles to Mt. Doom?" and watch the resulting chaos.
(Feel free to add your own!)
Comment on This
Email to a Friend
Digg This
Get more information on this article's topic here:
The Reading Room :
Humour :
Reader Comments
... 20 Comments
I like the last one, Lady!
Comment by Telre - April 28, 2007 @ 12:23 PM
Love em! keep goin'
Comment by Lord Kayasin - May 5, 2007 @ 6:40 AM
Funniness!!!!!!!!!!!
Comment by LuthienNienna - May 17, 2007 @ 5:26 PM
funny! like the last bit and the bit about posing for pictures! ^_^
Comment by applebook1901 - July 9, 2007 @ 8:04 PM
well I now know what I'd do if I found myself in middle earth.
Comment by Lanzy - August 30, 2007 @ 8:32 AM
one thing you could do to gimli and legolas: set up a machine gun on helm's deeping wall(make sure it's in a turret so you dont get shot) then just slaughter the uruks. while they're saying "twenty-one, twenty-two..." say "one-hundred, two-hundred,-threehundred..."they would really be ticked.
Comment by manofwater - December 23, 2007 @ 12:37 PM
for some reason, using an apostrophe turns into a "'" so the contraction for "it is" is "it's" sorry bout that
Comment by manofwater - December 23, 2007 @ 12:39 PM
another thing you could do is bring a learjet to carry frodo to mount doom and bring a couple F-16s to take care of fell beasts
Comment by manofwater - December 23, 2007 @ 12:41 PM
This is great haha.
Comment by striderchick - December 28, 2007 @ 12:47 PM
we need some more comments people
Comment by manofwater - January 6, 2008 @ 10:23 AM
shoot gandalf with a taser and use a squirt gun to shoot the balrog
Comment by manofwater - January 6, 2008 @ 10:24 AM
Pretend a joy buzzer ring is the One Ring and when you slip it on and DON'T disappear, laugh excitedly and slap Gandalf on the back.
Whenever Legolas speaks, say, "Thank you, Captain Obvious."
Give the hobbits chewing gum.
Comment by Phantasm - January 20, 2008 @ 6:13 PM
That was great!!!
Comment by imiriel - February 7, 2008 @ 5:46 PM
Good one with the chewing gum, Phantasm! :D
Comment by Kiriwana - February 13, 2008 @ 1:26 AM
when everything is quiet and calm holler out "NAZGUL!!"
or start asking "are we there yet?" over and over
Comment by Arwenslove - June 2, 2008 @ 10:58 AM
pull out the book and tell them what's going to happen next
Comment by bloodrose - September 29, 2008 @ 2:56 PM
I liked the last one. These are great! I don't think I would attempt to explain politics to them, or not believe Legolas that he's an elf. But I seriously laughed out loud. Why didn't they just take the eagles to Mt. Doom? It would have been much easier.
Comment by Heidi - September 30, 2008 @ 7:25 AM
When you appear, give them all hugs and tell them how much you missed them.
Tell legolas that he looked better as a pirate.
Comment by DwarvernTheMighty - December 7, 2008 @ 4:50 PM
When you appear, give them all hugs and tell them how much you missed them.
Tell legolas that he looked better as a pirate.
Comment by DwarvernTheMighty - December 7, 2008 @ 4:50 PM
When you appear, give them all hugs and tell them how much you missed them.
Tell legolas that he looked better as a pirate.
Comment by DwarvernTheMighty - December 7, 2008 @ 4:50 PM