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Caption Contest 73!!! - I wouldn't get this close to an ORC!

August 5, 2004
Submitted By ElvenArcher

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That's one brave man, getting that close to an.... erm... hungry?... orc.

I suppose it's all in a day's work.

Think of a humorous caption for this image, and post it in the comments section of THIS page. Click the thumbnail to see a larger image, but do not post the caption on the page with the larger image. Return to THIS page before posting your caption.

*Remember Tolkien Online is a family friendly site* so keep all captions Clean and G Rated.

As always, the only prize is "The satisfaction of a job well done."

Last week's winner was the ever witty naurghash with:

"Kenny Rogers called his therapist as the hobbit nightmares grew more virulent."

To see this and other past caption contests, click the "caption contest" link atop this page.

This weeks winner was Gwendolyn_of_Rohan
with "Yeah...we're fraternal twins...how could you tell?"

runners up were pellenor8989 with "As another day of filming for FOTR came to a close, Richard had to tell lurtz that due to unforseen circumstances, he would have to be killed off at the end of the movie. In response, Lurtz automatically changed tonights dinner course from hobbit to human. " and Luthienshadows with:
"Clean & Clear's "before and after" pictures were astonishing!"

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Reader Comments

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... 38 Comments

  1. Ugluk had never felt this way about a human before, but he could hardly help feeling butterflies in the pit of his stomach when Roy whispered sweet nothings in his ear.

    Comment by eowyn1420 - August 5, 2004 @ 9:55 AM

  2. Hey, Mr. Orc, I wasn't sure if you knew, but your fly's open.

    Comment by Lalaith-Elerrina - August 5, 2004 @ 12:39 PM

  3. Wow...that is one nice earring you're got there. Where did you find it? It reminds me of one my grandmother had....

    Comment by Rana-Minethlos - August 5, 2004 @ 1:21 PM

  4. Orc: MOMMY he took my lollipop

    Comment by Maranwe-Ar-Feiniel - August 5, 2004 @ 1:27 PM

  5. How about that! One CAN see right through an orc ear! Yep, there, Barad Dur over there, and the Black Gate, and...

    Comment by Liss_Eruvande - August 5, 2004 @ 1:42 PM

  6. Orc thinking: I can't touch my nose!
    Richard: Wow look at that!

    Comment by Anarane_Silimaure - August 5, 2004 @ 4:25 PM

  7. Richard: Can I get you some warm milk Lurtzy?

    Richard Taylor discovers the first orc woman.

    Lurtz licks his lips as he remembers the great taste of elf in the Casinoes of Isengard.

    Comment by Witch-King-of-Angmar - August 5, 2004 @ 4:28 PM

  8. One reason why so many states are against same gender marriages

    Comment by pellenor8989 - August 5, 2004 @ 4:37 PM

  9. Richard: Gee, your hair smells terrific!

    Comment by pippinsqueak - August 5, 2004 @ 6:51 PM

  10. NO means NO!

    Comment by BiggestLilEvil - August 5, 2004 @ 8:30 PM

  11. "Must be aud'de Mordor your wearring!"

    Comment by WriterOfRohan - August 5, 2004 @ 8:44 PM

  12. Richard: Oh, you smell wonderful, Lurtz! Is that a new parfume you're wearing?

    Lurtz: Yes, it's called Man-Flesh!!!

    Comment by idril_celebrimbal - August 5, 2004 @ 9:13 PM

  13. Richard: Uhh, you got some frosting left over from that pink cupcake you had during lunch.

    Comment by Elfie_the_Green - August 5, 2004 @ 9:31 PM

  14. As Lurtz licked his lips at the thought of Hobbit for breakfast, Richard tried some quick thinking intervention.

    Comment by Warrior_Maiden - August 6, 2004 @ 1:57 AM

  15. I can't see anything. Are you sure a worm went in your ear?

    Comment by gonturan - August 6, 2004 @ 10:01 AM

  16. You shouldn't let your Warg sleep in your bed. Seems to me that, you've got ear mites from him.

    Comment by rowanberry - August 7, 2004 @ 6:35 AM

  17. Yeah...we're fraternal twins...how could you tell?

    Comment by Gwendolyn_of_Rohan - August 7, 2004 @ 7:24 AM

  18. Gandalf say to Haldir that your mother smells of elves. Is that true?

    Comment by Tari_Lightfeather - August 7, 2004 @ 9:07 AM

  19. I love humans...but I couldn't eat a whole one.

    Comment by IrishElf* - August 8, 2004 @ 9:54 AM

  20. Doctor: "Next time put the lighter fluid cap back on the bottle before lighting the grill!"

    Comment by Elmtree - August 8, 2004 @ 1:09 PM

  21. Hey Lurts I have a booger on my chin can you lick it off? Gee Lurts you have great skin and I bet you don't even use clearasil!

    Comment by IrishDancinHobbit - August 8, 2004 @ 6:04 PM

  22. Do you want to go out some time.

    Comment by Feiniel - August 9, 2004 @ 4:35 PM

  23. Lurtz: What do you mean I'm going to be killed by Aragorn? Not fair! I quit!

    Comment by salean - August 10, 2004 @ 5:14 AM

  24. As another day of filming for FOTR came to a close, Richard had to tell lurtz that due to unforseen circumstances, he would have to be killed off at the end of the movie. In response, Lurtz automatically changed tonights dinner course from hobbit to human.

    Comment by pellenor8989 - August 10, 2004 @ 8:43 AM

  25. Strange inter-species mating rituals in Middle-Earth...on the next Jerry Springer.

    Comment by Ceyxa - August 10, 2004 @ 9:09 AM

  26. Richard: Loreal?! NO!!! By gum, no wonder your hair's a bit straggly. You need Herbal Essences!!! HERBAL ESSENCES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Comment by IrishElf* - August 10, 2004 @ 12:11 PM

  27. Granny, what BIG TEETH you have!!!!

    Comment by IrishElf* - August 10, 2004 @ 12:13 PM

  28. ... That's still not the salad fork.

    Comment by smeaglesprecious - August 10, 2004 @ 3:20 PM

  29. Is it made out of chocolate?!?

    Comment by Hobbit-lass - August 10, 2004 @ 5:12 PM

  30. Daylight on the other side

    Comment by the mouth of sauron - August 10, 2004 @ 9:51 PM

  31. Richard Taylor practices the art of "Mouth-to-ear Resuscitation".

    Comment by Ugluk - August 11, 2004 @ 8:36 AM

  32. "Lurtz, you know daddy doesn't like you sticking your tongue out when somebody's taking your picture."

    Comment by Ugluk - August 11, 2004 @ 8:38 AM

  33. *Insert brains here*

    Comment by smeaglesprecious - August 12, 2004 @ 2:54 PM

  34. Wow. That is one nice tongue piercing you've got there. Hobbit tooth? How unusual...

    Comment by IrishElf* - August 13, 2004 @ 1:51 PM

  35. ACK! Just realised my caption's practically the same as somebody else's...sorry!

    Comment by IrishElf* - August 13, 2004 @ 1:53 PM

  36. Clean & Clear's "before and after" pictures were astonishing!


    As a practical joke, Richard decides to tell Lurtz that Gandalf is hiding brownies under his hat.

    Comment by Luthienshadows - August 17, 2004 @ 9:15 PM

  37. If you think being close to an orch was impressive try being next to gimmly after he gets done running about 10 miles and still trying to catch up with the others. The closest I would get to an orch is about mabey a 16th of a millimeter away from it.

    Comment by kyeo - May 9, 2005 @ 1:11 PM

  38. Yep, just like i thought. There is a tiny sign in there saying "space for rent".

    Comment by Lady Elwen - March 11, 2007 @ 2:09 PM

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